It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
