So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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