Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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