Screwed.edu
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
