would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
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easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
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