Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize