loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize