Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
