lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
