I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
