I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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