If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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