i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
