I got chris browned last night
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize