Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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