I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
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