It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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