Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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