Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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