Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
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She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
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