Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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