Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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