Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize