What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
