singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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