are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
