it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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