im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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