Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize
