I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
