Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
