Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
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after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
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The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
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