so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
