Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.