By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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