There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
