Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
worst night to have a conscience
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
