So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
