Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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