I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
She made me pour olive oil on her.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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