Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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