O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
