just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
