shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize