You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
