Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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