It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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