Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
3 2 1 whiskey
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
