Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
