remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
